Tag: personal development

Leadership Defined

Posted on by Adam LiVecchi

Leadership is service, integrity and influence. When you serve someone they see your motives and find out that you have integrity. Then they know that they can trust you and will give you permission to influence them. In my opinion those are the basic mechanics of how leadership should work. Someone who is not willing to serve doesn’t deserve to have influence. I will not give anyone my trust before I see their integrity. Show me your integrity and I will give you my trust. Dwight Eisenhower said, “the supreme quality of leadership is integrity.” Integrity shows me they are safe and therefore trustworthy. When someone is trustworthy then and only then do I allow them to have influence in my life. Do not give someone influence in your life unless they are looking out for your best interests. Many people are disillusioned with leaders who they trusted and allowed to have influence in their lives when in all reality they should not have, because those leaders were not safe or trustworthy. Below are the 3 essential elements of leadership.

3 Essential Elements of Leadership 

  1. Service – Service is what we do for others at our own expense. We find a need and do something about it. We can use our strengths, relationships and resources to serve someone else and help them move forward in life. 
  2. Integrity – Integrity makes everything we do sustainable. Without integrity there is no real success or longevity. 
  3. Influence – Influence is granted when integrity is seen. Our service and integrity makes an impact on others. That impact is called influence.

Leadership is not just service, influence or integrity, it’s all three working together to demonstrate an example worth following.

Busyness

Posted on by Adam LiVecchi

Busyness is an enemy to what matters most. In my last blog I wrote about progress. The danger with progress is busyness. What I have observed about people who have a strong sense of direction is that they are driven. People who are driven need to be careful they don’t drive them self right off a cliff. Almost everyone is busy, but hardly anyone is getting anything done. Being busy is not necessarily bad. It’s hard to find anyone in life who is successful and not busy. However the busyness should be analyzed and prioritized. For example you could ask yourself why am I busy? Is it to medicate my anxiousness? Does being busy for busy sake give me a false sense of importance, that also gives me a false sense of security? Asking ourselves hard questions is essential for those who want success and longevity in the areas of life that matter most. Here is a thought in the form of a question about prioritizing your busyness to secure your success. Are you willing to sacrifice what money can’t buy for more money? If we are not careful in hopes of serving God we can become to busy for him. If we are not careful we can neglect our families today with the hopes of providing them with a better tomorrow. The most powerful thing you can give God and your family is you. I understand that we need to make sacrifices today for a better tomorrow. I get it. But I myself feel cautioned about sacrificing what money can’t buy for just a little more money. Slowing down may cost you now, but in the end slowing down now and learning when and how to rest will keep you fully charged so that you can give your best to who and what matters most. If you are to busy to rest one day a week you are to busy. The God who doesn’t get tired even took a day to rest. Remember Sabbath (rest) is about renewal not ritual. If you slow down now you will wind up going further in the long run. Life is more like a marathon than a 400 meter sprint. Find out what matters most and pour everything into it. Give your best to what matters most. You will never regret giving your best to who and what matters most.

Progress

Posted on by Adam LiVecchi

Progress causes us to turn our backs on those who don’t want to move forward. Progress means change and change is uncomfortable and uncertain. The cost of progress is change. The thought of change causes us all to ask questions. If I change does that mean I sold out? Will I get the desired results of that change if I change? Part of the pain of progress is that you by default turn your back on people who don’t want to move forward. Let me further clarify by telling you what I am not saying. I am not talking about thinking that you are better than people. I am not talking about betraying your family and friends. Let me give you a visual of what I am saying. Five guys are standing and facing north. One of them steps forward and continues to walk forward. What do his friends see? His back. So they no longer see him in the same manner? Did he change? Maybe, but did they stay the same? Yes. Progress means that we are consistently moving forward. The velocity is not as important as the direction and consistency. I am writing this so that you keep moving forward. Will you loose bad habits and people who don’t want to change? Yes. Will you become more and do more and contribute more? Yes. In reality most people want more but don’t use what they already have wisely. Most people don’t have the courage to change. Do you? We can’t really change if we don’t know who we truly are. Before progress can happen we must be honest with ourselves about where we really are in life. Progress begins when we take our first step forward. Which means we will leave some things and some people behind. Are you willing to move forward today? If so what does that mean for you? Let me give you a final thought that will help you gain traction in your life. When you know your priorities then and only then can you gain traction, get momentum and really make meaningful progress. Below are 5 simple steps that lead to progress. A better tomorrow starts today. Remember this, your choices are more powerful than your circumstances. 

5 Steps to Progress 

  1. Be honest with yourself. (Be Courageous) Courage starts the process. 
  2. Who are you? (Identity) Identity gives you purpose. 
  3. Where are you? (Location) Your journey begins where you are, not where you want to be.
  4. What are your priorities? (Values) Values give you priorities.
  5. Make the choice to let your priorities give you direction so that you can make progress. (Direction makes progress possible)

Self Neglect VS Self Denial

Posted on by Adam LiVecchi

You have a relationship with yourself. Jesus knew that and so he said, “love your neighbor as yourself.” He also said, “take up your cross deny yourself and follow me.” So which one should we do? Both. In fact doing one empowers us to do the other. Whether we know it or not we have a relationship with ourselves. Whether we speak out loud to ourselves or not we have an ongoing conversation with ourselves so we might as well be nice. Self Neglect is not denying yourself. Denying yourself is putting away sinful thoughts, speech and actions that lead to bad habits and harmful consequences. If you neglect yourself long enough you will not have the strength to deny yourself. Let me give you a practical example. I will use myself so as to not project my issue on you. If I wait too long to eat, I will most likely over eat or eat something that is unhealthy do to the level of hunger that I am feeling at the time. If I don’t neglect myself and I prepare for my day by having a healthy snack with me chances are a lot higher that I will not over eat and that I will probably eat something healthy. So preparing a healthy snack such as cashews or almonds is a practical way that I can love myself. Because I am not neglecting myself, I am positing myself not to eat two slices of pizza while I am out and about. Sometimes loving yourself is just thinking ahead and being prepared to make better choices that you won’t regret later. The more we care for ourselves now, the less regret we will have later. I have never regretted drinking a protein shake, however I  have regretted drinking a huge milkshake.

Many people think they are denying themselves when actually they are neglecting themselves. Jesus is the most amazing example of someone who did not neglect himself, but did denied himself so much that he never even sinned once. Not in thought, word or action. He knew exactly what he needed to do so that he could do what God was requiring him to do. We need to learn from his example. There were times where the disciples were sleeping and Jesus was praying. There were other times when the disciples were up wide awake and afraid in a storm, but Jesus was sleeping. If you love yourself, you will take care of yourself and that will allow you to deny yourself in other areas of life when temptations come. This is not about finger pointing its about soul searching. Being rested and prayerful will make you better able to care for yourself and deny yourself. 

I will leave you with 3 questions that will help you turn this blog post into an action plan that will help you make progress in your own life. 

  1. What is a practical way that you can love yourself today? (This must be productive, not destructive.)
  2. Is there an area in your life that you need to deny yourself?
  3. Is there an area in your life where you have been neglecting yourself?

Remember to care for yourself, invest in yourself and deny yourserlf. You are valuable, you matter! 

10 Commandments of Social Media

Posted on by Adam LiVecchi

Social Media is not just social. People hire and fire people according to their digital footprint. Remember if you post something online, send an e-mail or a text message a screen shot makes that electronic communication forever. This means we should not post anything online that we don’t want the whole world to see because there is a possibility of the whole world seeing it especially if someone goes awol. I wrote the 10 commandments of social media with your future in mind. I don’t want something you posted on social media to sabotage your success.

10 Commandments of Social Media

  1. Thou shalt not post on the Facebook wall of someone you have no relationship with.
  2. Thou shalt not tag people to a picture they are not in.
  3. Thou shalt not put your dirty laundry on Facebook. This is called social nudity and you could be in danger of being prosecuted for indecent exposure. This often makes people look crazy, unstable, unsafe and untrustworthy.
  4. Thou shalt not use passive aggressive behavior because you are afraid of confrontation.
  5. Thou shalt not make public posts that should be private conversations.
  6. Thou shalt not take provocative pictures of yourself if you expect to be treated with respect. (Bible verses and bikinis have nothing to do with each another.) If you need attention that bad you may need to see a Psychologist.
  7. Thou shalt not simply follow people because you want them to follow you back.
  8. Thou shalt not write in all capitals because people may think you are yelling at them.
  9. Thou shalt not post naked pictures of your children, that’s just weird. (There are too many sicko’s out there.)
  10. Thou shalt not post off topic and irrelevant comments on an original post because people will not take you seriously.

If you enjoyed this blog you will enjoy a short video that I did entitled – Social Nudity : the remix. Click here to watch.