Self pity is self destructive. Feeling bad for ourselves usually makes a bad situation worse. The longer we linger in self pity the longer the situation lasts. We often sabotage our own success with self pity. Self pity will keep us stuck in the past or present and will not allow us to see a hope filled future. Self pity tries to block us from what could be based upon what was or what is. As followers of Jesus we must remember that Jesus is the great I am, not the great I was or the great I will be. If we are breathing there is hope. When bad things happen to us, or when we make bad decisions and don’t like the consequences of those decisions, we often feel shame. If we don’t deal with the shame self pity can grow out of the soil of shame. Shame most often tells us that it’s time to change. Not dealing and responding correct to the shame results in self pity. Not dealing with self pity can be costly. Self pity, self bitterness, and self hatred could even lead to self destruction. If you are struggling with this right now ask Jesus to help you. He always hears a sincere and humble heart that reaches out to him for help. Just know you are not alone and there is hope. God is omnipresent which means he is there when you cried and he even bottles your tears. He is there to help. Allow the wisdom that you find on his word (the Bible) to guide your thoughts, words and actions and you will not stay stuck in self pity. I have visited self pity street and it’s worse than a boarded-up, run down neighborhood. There is no life or shelter there. Ask God for help and he will be there. He often sends help in the form of things we don’t want to hear. Listen, absorb it and make the necessary adjustments so you can break free and help others. Remember this, you can’t help someone with something that you are in bondage to yourself. If hurt people hurt people then free people help others get free and it was for freedom that Christ set us free. [Galatians 5:1]
- The proud – even God is resisting them. “But He gives more grace. Therefore He says: “God resists the proud, But gives grace to the humble.” [James 4:6] Pride will turn your advocate into your adversary. We can either choose to humble ourselves or be humiliated.
- The liar – someone who is not honest is not ready for help. Real help actually begins with honesty.
- The wanderer – someone who is everywhere but nowhere. They have no roots and so they aren’t able to receive help until they commit to plant themselves somewhere.
- The sinner – if someone is not willing to confess and forsake their sins they are stuck and you can’t help them out of where they want to be. We have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, but the sinner finds identity, direction and pleasure in their sin until it totally crushes them and brings them to Jesus. But not everyone lives through their sin. Some actually die in it. That could have been me, but by the mercy of God I didn’t.
The fear of the Lord brings an awareness that one day we will give an account to God for our intentions, words and actions. That is how the conscience is awakened and then we realize that we really need God. The kindness of God leads us to repentance. His patience with us is not his approval of what we are doing. Often the kindness of people is how God reveals his kindness to us. We can help to break up the fallow ground in the life of others by praying for and being kind and generous with people. Once humility begins to happen then grace appears and then change can happen for that person who was previously un-help-able. Just keep praying for and loving on folks. Leave the results to Jesus.
One of the first things you need to know is who not to listen to. If you listen to the wrong people you won’t last. Learning who and what to listen to is critical, especially if you want to last. I wrote this short blog entry because I want you to last, I want you to have longevity and I want you to be successful at what matters most. Psalm 1 begins with telling us that there is blessing for the man who doesn’t take council from the ungodly. Someone’s lifestyle will tell you if they are worth taking advice from or not. The Psalm goes on to talk about the man who focuses on God’s law will have success at whatever he does. The purpose of meditating on the law of God is so that you would premeditate to do what is right. Real success only comes from doing what is right in God’s sight. The Psalm goes on to use a fascinating metaphor. “He shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, That brings forth its fruit in its season, Whose leaf also shall not wither; And whatever he does shall prosper.” [Psalms 1:3 ] God plants you to prosper you. If you are not planted you can’t really prosper. In the verse above David writes, “whose leaf shall not wither.” This is speaking about supernatural longevity because you are not listening to the wrong people, you are focused on God’s word and you are planted to prosper and so God is giving this man who he called blessed supernatural longevity because his leaf shall not wither. My prayer for you is that your leaf will not wither in Jesus name!
“Do you see a man hasty in his words? There is more hope for a fool than for him.” [Proverbs 29:20 NKJV] Guarding the heart and taming the tongue is our responsibility. If we guard our heart it’s easier to tame our tongue. The heart and the tongue determine the direction of our life. If we change who and what we listen to we can change our language. If we change our language we can change our life. If our life changes lives around us will change. Being slow to speak means we will have to say sorry less. Often we break with our mouth the very things we are trying to build with our prayers. We must be cautions with our words. The words we speak must be truth spoken in love, seasoned with grace and spoken for the benefit of the hearer. Our timing and tone must be correct. For this we need to have a consistent relationship with the Scriptures and a sincere and sensitive relationship with the Holy Spirit. Father help us not to grieve or quench your Holy Spirit, I ask this in Jesus name!
Faith, hope and love all have a mutual friend, her name is patience. The trial of your faith produces patience, so where there is genuine faith there is authentic patience. Love is patient. In other words, an expression of love is patience. Hope actually means cheerful or hopeful endurance. So there is no real love, faith or hope without patience. Patience brings what God is doing in us to a place of maturity. There is no real spiritual or emotional maturity without patience. Jesus said, in patience you possess your soul. You can not have rule over your mind, will and emotions without patience. Often faith, hope and love are most commonly expressed through patience. Lord Jesus be our patience and by your grace give us the ability to cheerfully endure anything and everything that may come at us in this life.